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Can I Give You Some Feedback?

Started by Frank · 10 months ago

I worked at a consulting firm that used “benefit of the doubt” as an excuse for any kind of bad behavior. Someone flubs: Benefit of the doubt. Someone stabs you in the back: Benefit of the doubt. Someone says they’ll do something, then they don’% ... Continue reading »

2 comments

  • Great post, Frank. You hit exactly on why, when I train, I suggest that supervisors not use the term "feedback at all." Instead, launch right into what you want to talk about.

    Here is what you did, in non-judgemental behavior or performance language.

    Here is why we need to talk about it, in logical and emotional language if possible.

    After you've laid it out, stop and wait for the person you're talking with to respond. Wait no matter how long it takes. What you will get will determine what you talk about next and can be the start of a very good conversation.
  • Thanks, Wally. What you say it right on the money: Say what you want to say. Whenever someone tries that sin license with me -- can I give you some feedback? -- I'm already on the defensive. It just doesn't work. Your approach is the best approach: Tell them the facts and be logical. Have a conversation. That's what adults do...and it works.

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